Monday, February 8, 2010


I know, I know, I haven't been posting like I should.  I have missed some Snowflake Saturday posts and I really haven't been posting at all lately.  We were having some crisis situations with my oldest, K, and a lot of my attention was focused on that.  I really don't know how I am going to survive the teen years times 4!  The situation with K is more complicated in that her birth father, who has been absent most of her life, has recently decided that he wants to get to know her.

Problem is that I am dealing with some bitterness issues over that.  For me he took the easy way out and went and lived his life, usually not paying even the small amount of court ordered child support.  He unfortunately abused drugs during that time as well.  In the meantime, my husband stepped up when K was only 6 months old and took on the role of father for her.  We were married when she was 18 months old and he has been there for her through everything.  While I don't want to keep the birth father from knowing her, I am upset that he can legally waltz back in for the last 4 years of her life and have the same rights as someone who had been involved the entire time.  There is a reason that God tells us to reserve physical intimacy for marriage! 

So we have been in and out of court over this since he has violated the visitation agreement twice now.  Hopefully this is the last time.  It puts a lot of additional stress and hardship on K in addition to the normal teenage problems. 

We also have 1 vehicle completely out of commission due to a major oil leak, and the second vehicle is not mechanically sound either.  Fortunately a dear friend has loaned us a vehicle to use until we can get one fixed and a new one purchased. 

Add to that that S has worked 13 hour shifts M-F for the past 2 weeks and has spent the time he is home sleeping.  (remember, he works nights so that means sleeping during the day when everyone else is up and moving about the house).  Baby A, who had almost been broken of her pacifier is once again hooked on it.  I am not looking forward to trying to get her back to only having it when sleeping again. 

It has really been a crazy ride lately.  I trust that God will bring us through this though and that He will work it out for the best for all involved.  Me being the control type person I am though, I have a hard time sitting and watching and not knowing how it will end up.  Trust has always been an issue for me.

So i promise to try and get back to designing some patterns.  Currently I am trying to use up my odds and ends yarn stash.  That means lots of little projects and a scrap baby afghan are in the works.  It isn't until those are gone that I will allow myself to pull out full skeins from my stash. 

Just wanted to let you know that I haven't forgotten or abandoned the blog, just been really busy!



Amber said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

We will be praying for your family! I went through something very similiar with my dad. My parents only got married because of me and it was a healthy marriage for the 5 years they were married. He got involved with any woman that would have him and got heavily messed up with drugs. My my and dad fought in court several times. He served several different prision terms for drugs and never worked a legit job, therefore, my mother never received child support. I did not have a father from the time I was 6 on.

When I was 26, I gave him a call to meet for dinner. We have had a relationship since then. Now granted, it's not a "normal" father daughter relationship, but we are getting close. As of last year, I began calling him "dad" instead of his first name. I have also gained a step-mom and a half brother.

He lives a huge life of regret. Any stories he tells are of the past. I am so glad I decided to meet with him. Even if it didn't work out, I didn't want to life a life of what ifs.

I say you do what you think is right with your daughter, no one can tell you what is right or not. Stick with your gut feelings.

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